Water

drink up, bitch

Water is a liquid that is outside. it is a primary ingredient in the substance known as "piss" (the other ingredient is yellow). Water is the primary cause of an item becoming moist. in some cultures it is known as H2O, which means "hard 2 orate", since you usually start drowning if you try to talk underWater, but this can be averted if you can guzzle it fast enough. sometimes there is a lot of Water in one place and it forms something called a "pool". some pools get so big that creatures like fish or crabs or other deep Water creatures spontaneously appear in it, as detailed by the philosopher Aristotle in his writings on hylomorphism.

what is Water?

i just fucking told you, it's a liquid from outside. it has something like three atoms in it but sometimes there's more and people call it "heavy" Water which I think is kinda rude. who cares what its atomic weight is.

where can I find Water?

its outside. or you can go inside and explore the bathroom for new and exciting locations of Water. don't tell anyone i told you this, but i have some Water in a container right next to me. it's my own special secret supply and I WON'T share it with you.

some discredited fringe scientists want you to believe that you and I are made of something like 55%-60% Water, those fucking idiots. we're made of meat, everybody knows that.

what can Water do?

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  it can fall

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  it can cress

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  it can slide

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  it can melon

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  it can sports

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  it can bed

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  it can wheel

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  it can cycle

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  bro look at this fucking furry porn I found in wikimedia commons while looking for a pair of wet pants

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  it can lily