Griffin Spade
| Griffin Spade | |
|---|---|
| |
| "My name is Griffin Spade, Battlelord. Maybe you've heard of me." | |
| STATUS: PRESUMED DEAD | |
| Years active | 2001-2006 |
| Occupation | Engaged |
| Fighting style | Tank |
| Favorite food | Crude Oil |
| Major arcana | XVI The Tower |
| Charisma | 11 (+0) |
| Drops | His fiancée |
Griffin Spade is the titular character of BattleTanx and BattleTanx Global Assault. In the far off future of 2001, a virus has killed 99% of the tank population of Earth. Various countries fight over each other's quarantine zones, and end up engaging in nuclear war, destroying much of civilization. The few remaining tanks (called QueenTanx) are held by gangs who have taken over small pieces of the world.
Plot
Griffin Spade is the humansona of Battle Tanx, the game's lead protagamonist. In Battletanxz 1 he doesn't do anything because I didn't play that game but in Battletanx Universal Tour he blows up San Francisco and then a truck stop and then a texas slave fortress and then a drive in and then the dc mall and then the white house and then the US parliament and then the london tower bridge and then the tower of london and then THE bistro and then the champs elysees and then the eiffel tower and then brandenburg gate and then berlin and then the shore and then san francisco again (because fuck 'em) and then alcatraz and then the ending credits. He has a stupid motobike son named Brandon who uses the power of Edge and a bitch wife Golianth named Cassandra. Neither of them know how to use the secret weapon action commands that battletanx stole from the better vehicle combat series named twisted metal that youve never heard of
Legacy
people named a real life kind of heavy car after battletanx did you know?