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== Health effects == [[File:Gamer kitten.jpg|thumb|gamer suffering from wifi poisoning]] WiFi causes lag poisoning to any gamer that encounters it in an online session. If another gamer participating in the session has been contaminated with WiFi, it rapidly spreads to all other players, causing their mood to plummet and their temper to flare wildly. The more WiFi a gamer encounters, the more rapidly their situation deteriorates. WiFi is especially dangerous to fighting game players, and Super Smash Bros. Melee players (because these are objectively two different categories of gamer). After 7 days of playing against WiFi players, a gamer will die.
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